Delamar Arias, radio jock
Fiancée to musician/BPO executive Tyler Ashby Mom to Cooper, 4, and Parker, 8 months old Excerpt from Delamar's interview on Smart parenting: My doula Irina asked me ‘what do you want?’ and I said ‘Irina, I want to own this pregnancy, this might be my last’ and we already talked about it. "I want to be awake, I want to be part of this birth, I want to be there, I don’t want to be sedated and I want to make sure that all hormones that are needed for breastfeeding start." During my labor, Irina put this musical piece on loop and told me, ‘Remember when I was meditating in one of my pre-natal visits to your house and I told you to close your eyes and look for a word that will empower you, will make you feel safe, that will guide you through the pain? Call on that word now. You don’t have to say it out loud, just say it over and over in your mind’. That really calmed me down as she held my hand. Irina was like my lawyer; she’s the one telling everybody in the hospital, ‘This is what she wants’, because I couldn’t say it for myself. During the delivery she was telling me what was happening beyond the curtain so it made me feel part of the birth. So I calmed down, and the next thing I know, they had pulled the baby out and he was crying so loud. Still I was so afraid that the doctors would tell me bad news. It can really drive you crazy. When they laid the baby, I saw him and he was so big, he was so white and he looked like...an alien! They made him latch and he had a good latch, I remember, then they took him away. I was aware the whole time. I didn’t fall asleep from the time that I gave birth to the time that I was in the recovery room. Irina was there and we were talking. I felt all that adrenaline. Read the FULL INTERVIEW on Smart Parenting website My entire life, I have been scared at the thought of giving birth. I was scared of the pain, and I was scared of dying while giving birth. My father’s mother died giving birth to him, and something my mother said became ingrained in my mind: “Nasa hukay and isang paa pag nanganganak ang babae, pero pag binigay niya buhay niya para sa anak niya, dederetso siya sa langit. (One foot is in the grave when a woman gives birth, but if she gives her life for her child’s, then she’ll go straight to heaven for sure.)”
So when I found out I was pregnant, I studied birthing topics as if I’ll be taking an exam after the supposed 40-week period. In my pursuit of knowledge, I became confused and more scared, so I tried searching for people who can help me understand birthing. I learned about doulas and chanced upon Irina Otmakhova’s (Conscious Birth Manila) website where I learned about her workshop on Hypnobirthing and Fetal Positioning Techniques. This workshop changed my perspective about childbirth. Before, I was dead set on getting an epidural, and even considered a voluntary C-section. By the end of the day, I was 90% sure that I want a medication-free birth. A couple of months after that, Irina became my doula. So for this birth, I had a doula, studied Hypnobirthing (Hypnobabies 6-week self-study course), adjusted my diet to what was specified in Hypnobabies, and did my best to exercise. I kind of failed in the physical fitness area. By the time I found a prenatal yoga class in our seventh month, I was placed on a fourteen-day bed rest due to spotting and contractions. When that period was over, I just shied away from physical activity, except for one pre-natal yoga session in my ninth month with Yogini Sonia. T I M E L I N E 4th November — Irina came over in the morning for our second pre-natal session. Here, she taught us birthing positions, and some exercises to help with the waves (contractions) where we used rebozo and birthing balls. She also e-mailed me an acupressure manual for pain management and stimulation of labor. We even discussed the next appointment with my OBGYN where Irina will accompany me, and rounded up a couple of questions to bring up regarding my Birth Plan. We ended the session with a rehearsal of the birthing time, summing up all the techniques she taught us. After the pre-natal session, my next goal for the day was to show our new maid the ropes around our apartment. My mom also arrived on the 2nd of November to keep me company whenever Ralph (my husband) is at work. After dinner, Ralph and I went to the grocery to stock up on food, and to purchase last-minute items in our Hospital Bag List. Read the FULL STORY on Roxanne's blog. If you’ve been following me on Instagram, you probably know I’ve been preparing for a normal (vaginal delivery), natural (unmedicated) birth.
As I always say though, I am aware that sometimes, things don’t always happen as planned, though what’s important is that you worked for it and tried your best. Of all things I did not in any way consider nor expect, it was how my labor started. This is my story with my firstborn, Pablo. *** 37 weeks – We visited our doctor for our checkup and it was the first time she did an I.E. (internal/vaginal examination) on me. According to her, my cervix was already about 50% effaced and I was about 1-2 cm dilated. I told her I was not sure but there seemed to be a little blood in my underwear the previous night, but I was wearing a black underwear (big mistake! lesson learned: do not wear dark underwear when on your 37th week onwards) so there’s a chance it might be a false alarm. She told me to just observe, asked me if I felt any contractions, told her not yet, but that I would keep an eye on them. Everything looked great so far! When we got home, a series of events happened that led me to thinking I was going to be in labor soon: I had diarrhea all day even though I was eating the same food, I also had irregular contractions for about 2 days, and I would have discharge every once in a while (which I never had throughout my pregnancy prior to this week). 38 weeks – No signs of going into labor. No contractions of any sort. My OB did another I.E. and I was about 2-3 cm dilated. She told me it’s impossible to be dilated without contracting, so maybe I just really wasn’t feeling it. I had a biophysical scan profile (a kind of ultrasound that measures the health of the baby) to make sure the baby was fine, and everything was going as planned. I was happy to reach at least 38 weeks! I wanted to give birth somewhere in between the 39th and 40th week because that would mean full term, but reaching 38 was good enough for me. 39 weeks – Still no signs of labor. No contractions. ... READ the full story on Paula's website |
AuthorIrina is a birth
keeper, mother and an advocate. As a certified Childbirth Doula and
Hypno-Doula she accompanies mothers through pregnancy, birth and postpartum to
ensure a joyful, balanced and pleasurable experience. It is her greatest joy to
see mothers to come out of birth feeling empowered, proud and honored. Archives
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